25: "Nakakakain ako ng salamin. Hindi naman ako masasaktan." means "I can eat glass. It doesn’t hurt me." in Tagalog.

It’s now 11:25 am Friday, and this is the latest that I’ve ever started writing a Friday edition of the flip front. Maybe the election’s gotten me more worked up than it should have — you all read the Wednesday election special — and it’s so hard to focus when I’m worked up. Normally, I don’t mind being bewitched, bothered, and bewildered. But getting worked up over an election instead of a cute boy is not as racy as you might think. My naivete in the ways of politics has now revealed itself. So I will leave the political discussions to the experts and return to gossiping like the minx that I am. Ooooh, saucy!

I’m at work right now. On the far side of the partition, Raul is singing “Who let your mom out?” instead of “Who let the dogs out?” Matt has just suggested that we just let Bush and Gore be co-presidents. Which brings me back to high school, ‘cos we had co-presidents for everything — Student Government, the French Club, the Upper School Bell Ringers. The co-president system seemed to work for us, and it just looks so nice on a college application: being a “co-president” implies leadership qualities and the ability to cooperate with your peers.

I actually ran for head of the Athletic Association with my friend Jess Bohonowych. We didn’t particularly want to win. We knew the best girls for the job were Margaret Angell and Jessica Gilbert — lifers who had each been on three teams per academic year since the fifth grade. They jogged to school. They were wardrobed entirely by Eddie Bauer, L.L. Bean, and Patagonia. They owned multiple pairs of Teva sandals. They had a constant supply of red paint with which to decorate our faces and limbs for sporting events. Sure, they were amazing athletes, but that’s besides the point. They looked the part, and that was enough for most.

Jess and I ran because Jessica and Margaret were running unopposed and we thought it would be fun to give a speech during assembly. It’s not often that you can have the attention of several hundred teenage girls, to hold them captive as you extoll the virtues of caffeinated water, and the importance of co-ed underwater basket weaving. Our platform was grounded in the concept of getting as much credit as a student could with as little effort as possible. Needless to say, we didn’t win, but actually managed to get something like 50 votes out of a possible 400. Which was about 40 more than I expected. Maybe I do have what it takes to be a politician. Just point me to your nearest high school and I should be all set. I will rock your world and win the prom queen tiara. Yee haw.

I was supposed to have a little informational telephone chat with somebody from blackvoices.com. It seems that they need a “Technology Manager” after the first of the year and they found my resume in the tribjobs.com database. I waited, breath bated, by the phone two nights in a row, and nothing. Caroline, the contact chickie, e-mailed me yesterday to say that the power had gone out in her apartment building Wednesday night. So we rescheduled for last night. I watched “Friends” uninterrupted by not a single call.

It’s not like I’m desperate for this job, but if you’re going to call, then call. If not, then e-mail me the next day and explain why. She has yet to contact me. I’m sure she has a good reason, as who wouldn’t want me on their side? I rock. I’m sure there was some sort of emergency. Like her building burning down. Maybe she got run over by a golf cart.

Stranger things have happened. This is America, after all. Our next president is sure to be a cokehead or a robot. Some of us believe that Elvis Presley is still alive. We invented Spam and daylight saving’s time. We consume corn dogs in large quantities. We bet on turtle races.

We have made Richard Simmons a household name.

This country has so much to be proud of.

Cheers,

the white rabbit

“Trigger Happy Jack you’re gonna blow

But I’m gonna get off before you go

My Trigger Happy Jack is just a drive by a go-go . . .”

(Poe, “Trigger Happy Jack” — ooh! smutty!)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

*playlist*

Tahiti 80 — Things are made to last forever; Spice Girls — Holler; Aluminum Group — Plano (album); Rolling Stones — Jumping Jack Flash; Louis Armstrong & Ella Fitzgerald — Autumn in New York; The Smiths — Reel Around the Fountain; David Bowie — The Man Who Sold the World; Etta James — I Just Want to Make Love to You; Flaming Lips — After the Gold Rush; Dolly Parton — Jolene & Just Because I’m A Woman; Albita — Me Derrito; Fred Astaire — The Way You Look Tonight

*blog*

http://www.fec.gov/pdf/eleccoll.pdf — how the electoral college works

(make sure you have Adobe Acrobat Reader installed on your computer!)

http://www.theshowerproject.com — no explanation needed

http://www.blackvoices.com — potential future employer

*bibliography* — note that I’m re-reading all but the first book

Peter Guralnick, _Careless Love: The Unmaking of Elvis Presley_

Mitchell Duneier, _Slim’s Table_

The Bishop Don Magic Juan, _From Pimpstick to Pulpit: “It’s Magic!” The Life Story of Don “Magic” Juan (Sean, you still have this — are you done? can I have it back?)

Iceberg Slim, “Pimp”

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~ by Jasmine on November 10, 2000.

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