66: the way you wear your hat

Things That Make The Heart Beat Faster (a page from my non-existent pillow book)

1. walking up stairs

2. “Ain’t No Way” by Aretha Franklin (also: “I’ll Take Good Care of You” by Garnett Mimms and “O Holy Night”)

3. the ocean (any will do, though I am partial to the Pacific)

4. “Oh look at that! Those shoes are actually on sale!”

5. a good snogging session (and it’s been a long time since I’ve had one of these, so I’m actually guessing here)

My co-worker Matt has been working on his application for “Survivor III” for the last two months. When he’s not thinking of the three perfect adjectives to describe himself or photocopying his passport, he’s playing “Eye of The Tiger” over and over again. It’s really kinda scary, but I manage. Somehow. But then I’ve incorporated Culture Club’s “I’ll Tumble 4 Ya” into my daily listening diet so who am I to talk?

So it’s been over a week since the last flip front and so much has happened. Celi is in town, and her first weekend here the weather was gorgeous. It was 80 degrees, so we walked to the park Sunday afternoon before having dinner at Nate’s house that evening. Quaffing lemonade and smoking cigarettes, it was easy to forget that my foot was killing me (plantar warts — hopefully I’m getting them removed with liquid nitrogen on Thursday) and that Celi no longer lives in Chicago. It was just like old times, gossiping and just being stupid. I missed Seema and Andrew.

We saw “Spy Kids” Sunday night and I managed to enjoy myself , despite the absence of bon bons at the concessions stand. I had to settle for nachos, but it just wasn’t the same. They never give you enough cheese for the chips. Antonio Banderas was actually entertaining instead of just embarrassing, but “Spy Kids” still wasn’t as good as anything he’s made with Pedro Almodovar. Sure it had Alan Cumming (who is quite attractive, albeit in an unsettling slimy sort of way) as a loopy villain but he just wasn’t as fabulous as the mother of Antonio Banderas’ character in “Women on The Verge of A Nervous Breakdown”. But then, there isn’t much that can top a middle-aged lunatic riding around Madrid on a motorcycle wearing 6″ long false eyelashes.

The VH1 Divas special was on last night and it was almost a little boring in comparison to last year’s tribute to Diana Ross. Maybe the problem is that Aretha Franklin, the evening’s guest of honor and emcee, was not beset with the sort of idiosyncrasies that defined Diana Ross’ performance last year. Okay, I was a little put off by the “Blues Brother” like dancers for “Think” but her rendition of “Nessun dorma” more than made up for it. Also, you must respect any large woman who comes out wearing tight white lace and sequin capri pants and matching halter top.

The real low patch of the evening would have to be Nelly Furtado singing her current “hit”, “Like A Bird”. She tried to get the audience on her side but they weren’t having it. I think they wanted Jill Scott back, as she ruled. As was Mary J. Blige. And Marc Anthony and Celi Cruz. Everyone, in fact, was in top form except for poor little Nelly. She looked like she was going to cry. Ah, she’s young yet — she’ll get over it soon enough.

Since Celi’s been here, the same creepy HBO sex program has been on twice. We haven’t been able to catch it from the beginning — we’ve always come upon it during the “SwingStock” segment of the program. Picture 20 middle-aged couples having sex in the middle of what looks like your average elementary school playground. They’re not particularly appealing to me, and I don’t think that Celi found them attractive either. It wouldn’t have been so bad had these swingers not made the mullet their hairdo of choice. I thought sex was supposed to look hot, but watching these people have sex was like watching an old man singing “The Old Gray Mare” with his pants around his ankles while dancing at the side of the highway.

You knew I wouldn’t let you get away without a semi-obscure reference to “The Simpsons”, didn’t you?

Anyway, I have to get back to work, as I’ve had actual stuff to do this past week. Below are some semi-amusing links to tide you over until Friday.



Yo no quiero que las flores sepan

Los tormentos que me de la vida.

Si supieran lo que estoy sufriendo

Por mis penas llorarian tambien.

(Rafael Hernandez)


The Flamingos – As Time Goes By; Folk Implosion – Natural One; No Doubt – A Simple Kind of Life; St. Etienne – Boy Is Crying; Culture Club – I’ll Tumble 4 Ya; Mariah Carey – Love Hangover; Monica – The First Night (of course); Stevie Wonder – I Was Made to Love Her; Ibrahim Ferrer & Omara Portuondo – Silencio




http://student-www.uchicago.edu/~ahkissel/cheers.html – why do our cheers suck?





~ by Jasmine on April 11, 2001.

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