304: jasmine & the inappropriate dream machine

I want to eat the cupcakes but I can’t. I shouldn’t. They’re for Jacinda’s shower and not for me to eat, alone, while watching the BBC’s “Pride & Prejudice” starring Jennifer Ehle and Colin Firth. So I showered, and went to the store to get some cash and buy myself a can of Chef Boyardee. Jalissa and her mom picked me up, and we drove to Jacinda’s to set up for the bridal shower.

It was a gorgeous day, if a bit warm, so I sweated as we kicked Joe and Jacinda out of their house, put up balloons and streamers, set out food, helped Claire when she arrived with soda and folding chairs that we set up in the yard. I paid the delivery men when they appear, first with an assortment of Mediterranean food and then with a gigantic pan of bruschetta. Guests arrived and were duly fed, watered, and seated in the living room with their various gifts and envelopes. The dogs barked from their confinement in the television room. We played games, opened presents, gave away prizes and favors, talked and ate cupcakes. After it was over, Jalissa gave me a few rolls of toilet paper that we ended up not using in the toilet paper bride game, and we divided the leftover food into plates for people to take home. Getting married is an exhausting business, and I’m not even getting hitched.

Sometimes when I am feeling low (usually after I’ve left the gym), I feel like the only aisle I will ever go down is the aisle of the no. 56 bus, that the only rice I will ever brush off my shoulders will be left over from a lunch of Chinese takeout, that the only roses I will carry will be the ones I usually steal from my neighbors’ yard. But most of the time I’m not even sure if I want to be married. I have enough problems keeping myself entertained and adored, let alone the energy to entice somebody else. Maybe this is just too many “chick lit” books talking, which would be just as well. Serves me right for buying books off the “Books for Women” shelf at Borders.

I’ve had two wholly inappropriate dreams this week, one about a co-worker and another inhabited by a bunch of friends and a girl who I don’t even know very well. The first dream took place on my couch, the second on a fictional subway platform and in a make-believe diner in Brooklyn. The second dream also had a 3′ high bottle of malt liquor.

It was weird.




Kylie Minogue – Sweet Music; Ryan Adams – So Alive; David Bowie – Oh! You Pretty things; French Kicks – Close To Modern



http://www.mediabistro.com/articles/cache/a1814.asp (the article quotes me anonymously — guess what I wrote and win a prize!)


~ by Jasmine on June 18, 2004.

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