PR5.1: live-blog

8:08 pm: The designers have joined Heidi and Tim on the roof for champagne. Right now, there are simply too many of them for me to keep track of names. Patrick says (via IM): “that old dude from detroit lookslike dantefrom clerks”. Bwahahahaha.

8:09 pm: Designer girls are embarassed by their own stank asses when Tim wakes them up super early the next day. Do they not know the way of Tim? He is an early-rising motherfucker.

8:10 pm: GRISTEDES CHALLENGE! Yay! Which means Austin Scarlett, who won the original challenge, is back to help. Whee! He tells them that innovation was the key to his success — I hope the designers are paying attention. They’ve only got $75 — imagine how much more they could get if they went to, like, C-Town?

8:12 pm: “My strategy? Mop heads. Mop heads. Mop heads.” Blond chick with the eyeliner says she doesn’t want to do easy and pick lots of fabric like things. Somebody has a cart full of pasta. Oh boy…

8:13 pm: C-break. Patrick thinks we’re gonna see a lot of recycled challenges from previous seasons so season 5 can go quickly  and Lifetime can start cashing in by starting season 6 with a quickness. I’m still trying to picture Tim Gunn driving a Porsche Boxster and wearing L.A. casual. I shudder inwardly. The Shear Genius commercial is stupid: what’s up with that dude who has three faces, one of which he uses to stab you in the back? What does that even mean?

8:19 pm: Parsons! They have until midnight to complete their assignment. Winner gets immunity (thank jebus). Joe’s theme is going italian with a tomato fusilli dress. Hm. Kelli is making a garden dress, using bleach to make a marbly print. “Pretty ugly in a great way.”

8:20 pm: Jerell tries to throw some shade towards Blayne about his “licious” gig. Sadly, the shade was not so shady.

8:21 pm: Is it just me or are there are a lot of random skinny girls who look like Feist? Bo-ring. Stella realizes her garbage bags are the worst fabric. That’s what happen when you buy discount. Go Hefty! I just saw something pretty and yellow — what is it?!

8:23 pm: Tim checks in with the designers. Blayne introduces Tim to “Girlicious”. Oh boy. Kelli used vacuum paper bags — cool!

8:25 pm: “I see a whole lot of table cloth.” Ooh, he calls them slackers! Awesome.

8:26 pm: the designers are united in fear. I fear Jerry may get cut for his boring shower curtain/table cloth combo.

8:32 pm: The designers get to reworking while Stella worries that she’s gonna go home on account of her janky trashbags. Jerell tells her to make it work! In the morning, they talk about how they are all afraid: of getting judged by Michael and Nina. Can’t say that I’m blame them.

8:34 pm: Models arrive, and are fitted. Kenley thinks Jerry’s coat reminders of American Psycho. Dang girl.

8:35 pm: Runway! And is it just me or is this shit going really fast? Also, the big screen version of Brideshead Revisited looks, sadly, kinda boring.

8:40 pm: Wait, Austin’s now the creative director for Kenneth Cole? Nice.

8:41 pm: The looks

  • Jerell used a lawn chair and paper umbrellas. Cute party look.
  • Korto’s dress with fresh veg accent is gorgeous.
  • Boring girl used paper towels and lipstick — pretty!
  • I was excited for Terri’s mop heads, and still am but the skirt was kinda weak
  • Joe’s pasta skirt looks like it’d be fun to wear.
  • Kenley’s dress is as cute as she is annoying.
  • I hope Jerry’s long raincoat doesn’t get him cut.
  • Blayne’s model looked uncomfortable.
  • Why the circle boobs on Kelli’s dress?

8:45 pm: On the runway: Daniel, Blayne, Jerry, Stella, Kelly, Korto. The others are safe.

  • Daniel: Nina liked the sculptural farm. Michael thought he was smart but could have gone further.
  • Jerry: Is she like a bridal nurse? Michael does not love it, and neither does anybody else.
  • Korto: Austin lauds her for making something very chic and alive. It’s just right!
  • Stella: She didn’t do anything.
  • Kelli: Love from the judges for her innovation and meticulous technique.
  • Blayne: Playboy bunny gone grunge in a diaper.

8:50 pm: Judges loved Kelli: “She found the possibility in everything.” Daniel had cofidence enough to use only cups. Korto gets low marks for tablecloth, but high marks for the overall look. Her good taste is obvious. As for the bottom 3: Stella’s punk pov was just punk ugly. Jerry’s dress was just strange. And just like Kellney said, it looks like something from a slasher film. And when Austin saw Blayne’s model, he wrote “hideous” on his card.

8:52 pm: Oooh, the six are called back to the runway. Which one will it be…

8:56: Korto is safe. Kelli wins and Daniel looks kind of bummed. Oh boo hoo. And now my favorite part: the losers. Blayne is safe, so he leaves the runway so Stella and Jerry can look uncomfortable and sad. Jerry’s look was memorable (not in a goodway) and unwearable. Stella took the easy way out and still fucked it up. And yet, Jerry is out. Bye bye, sole Asian dude.

8:58 pm: Tim and the remaining designers say goodbye.

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~ by Jasmine on July 16, 2008.

One Response to “PR5.1: live-blog”

  1. Austin’s working for Kenneth Pool, not Kenneth Cole. They make wedding dresses – like the one Austin made for Lori on Real Housewives of Orange County. Boy, I know way too much about this stuff!

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